[理知논술/영어 논술 클리닉]중학 영어

입력 2007년 3월 6일 02시 59분

코멘트: 개

좋아요: 개

■ 논제

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? High schools should allow students to study the courses that students want to study.

여러분이 고등학교에 진학하게 되면 과목 선택권을 주는 학교가 좋을지 아니면 반대의 경우가 좋을지 생각해 봅시다.

■ 학생글

김주형·경기 부림중학교 1학년

My sister is not allowed to study courses that she wants to study and I will not allowed to study courses that I want to study as well. Many people including my sister say that this policy is students but I think this is not good for them for several reasons. First, a student can study some subjects really hard because he wants to study the subjects. Second, the subjects that the student decides to study will play an important role in his future. Third, the student can concentrate on the subjects that he decides to study very well. First of all, I think high schools have to allow students to study subjects that they want to study because they can study the subjects really hard. When a student studies some subjects that he decides to study, he will study really hard because the students want to study the subjects. For example, when a student decides to study science, he will study very hard because science is very interesting to him. In one of my sister's friends' case, is not very good at studying but she likes social science very much. One day there was a very important exam in her school. She studied social science very much because she liked it although she did not study other subjects. So her grade of social science was excellent. Like this, high schools have to allow students to study subjects that they want to study because they can study the subjects really hard. Moreover, the subjects that the student decides to study will play an important role in student's future. When a student chooses a subject, the student will think that the subject is suitable for him. So he will study the subject hard and the subject play an important role in his future. For example, if a student chooses math and studies hard, math will play an important role in his future. One of my brothers is a good example of this. He did not study subjects except for physical science. However, his school did not allow students to study subjects that they want to study. So his grades were terrible. Only good grade was the grade of physical science. He became famous for physical science and earned a lot of money after he graduated. As we see, high schools have toallow students to study subjects that they want to study because the subjects that the students decide to study will play an important role in students' Furthermore, the student can concentrate on the subjects that he decides to study very well. When a person has to do a lot of works, he can not concentrate on one thing. On the other hand, of he has few works to do he can concentrate on them very well. For example, if a student has to study a lot of subjects, he can not concentrate on one subjects but if he has few subjects to study, he can concentrate on them. My sister and one of my brothers are a good example of this. My sister has to study a lot of subjects so she can not concentrate on one subject so her grades are not good overall. On the other hand, one of my brothers who is an university student has few subjects to study so he can concentrate on them well. Like this, high schools have to allow students to study subjects that they want to study because the student can concentrate on the subjects that he decides to study very well. To conclude, I think high schools have to allow students to study subjects that they want to study because they can study the subjects really hard, the subjects that the student decides to study will play an important role in student's and the student can concentrate on the subjects that he decides to study very well. There are many effective ways for students but this policy is also a very good way for students.

■ 첨삭글

My sister is not allowed to study courses that she wants to study and I will not be allowed to study courses that I want to study as well. Many people, including my sister, say that this policy isfor students, but I don't think this is good for them for several reasons. First,student can study some subjects really hard because he wants to study the subjects. Second, the subjects that the student decides to study will play an important role in his future. Third,the student can concentrate on the subjects that he decides to study very well.

First of all, I think high schools have to allow students to study subjects that they want to study because they can study the subjects really hard. When a student studies some subjects that he decides to study, he will study reallyrd because he wantsto study the subject. For example, when a student decides to study science, he will study very hard because science is very interesting to him. In one of my sister's friends' case,is not very good at studying but she likes social science very much. One day there was a very important exam in her school. She studied social science very much because she liked it although she did not study other subjects. So her grade insocial science was excellent. Like this, high schools have to allow students to study subjects that they want to study because they can study the subjects really hard.

Moreover, the subjects that the student decides to study will play an important role inthe student's future. When a student chooses a subject, the student will think that the subject is suitable for him. So he will study the subject hard and the subjectwill play an important role in his future. For example, if a student chooses math and studies it hard, math will play an important role in his future. One of my brothers is a good example of this. He did not study subjects except for physical science. However, his school did not allow students to study subjects that they wanted to study. So his grades were terrible. His only good grade was the grade in physical science. He became famous for physical science and earned a lot of money after he graduated. As this shows, high schools have to allow students to study subjects that they want to study because the subjects that the students decide to study will play an important role instudents' future.

Furthermore, the student can concentrate on the subjects that he decides to study very well.When a person has to do a lot of work, he can not concentrate on one thing. On the other hand, if he has only a few subjects to do, he can concentrate on them very well. For example, if a student has to study a lot of subjects, he can not concentrate on one subject,but if he has few subjects to study, he can concentrate on them. My sister and one of my brothers are a good example of this. My sister has to study a lot of subjects, so she can not concentrate on one subject and her overall grades are not good. On the other hand, one of my brothers, who is an university student, has a few subjects to study so he can concentrate on them well. Like this, high schools have to allow students to study subjects that they want to study because the student can concentrate on the subjects that he decides to study very well.

To conclude, I think high schools have to allow students to study subjects that they want to study because they can study the subjects really hard, the subjects that the student decides to study will play an important role inthe student's future, and the student can concentrate on the subjects that he decides to study very well.There are many effective ways for students,but this policy is also a very good way for students.

■ 총평

일반론→구체적 사례 순으로 글전개, 강력한 메시지 전달

김주형 학생의 에세이는 토플 에세이의 전형이라고 볼 수 있다. 문법적 오류가 있기는 하나 글의 구조가 매우 좋다. 글의 구성은 흠잡을 데 없으며 예도 잘 들어 주었다.

이 글이 좋은 이유는 본문의 각 문단이 아주 강한 논지를 주장하고 있기 때문이다. 우선 general statement로 시작해서 본인의 경험에 바탕을 둔 구체적인 예로 진행해 가고 있기 때문이다. 모든 문단은 다음과 같은 형식을 따라야 한다.

A. Sentence 1: Topic Sentence (General Idea)

B. Sentence 2: List of Specific Examples

C. Sentence 3-end: Personal Experience Situation

예를 들어보면 더 이해가 쉬울 것이다.

A: Fruit is my favorite food because it is delicious.

B: I really love fruit like apples, oranges, and strawberries.

C: Every morning, I eat fruit like apples or oranges for breakfast, because the great taste makes me feel happy, and the fresh taste wakes me up from my sleep.

이런 형태를 정확하게 따른다면 본문에 해당하는 문단은 매우 명확하고 강력한 메시지를 전달하게 된다. 독자가 이해하기 쉬우며 반박하긴 어려워진다. 이는 글을 쓰는 사람이 자신의 생각을 잘 전달하며 동시에 비록 문법적 오류가 몇 군데 있더라도 영어를 잘 구사한다는 증거가 된다.

그동안 훌륭한 글을 보내주었던 친구들에게 감사하며 앞으로도 계속 이지논술을 벗 삼아 영어 실력 향상에 힘쓰길 빈다.

장보숙 영재사관 YES어학원 실장

저스틴 루이스 영재사관 YES어학원 팀장

■ 써서 보내요

Evaluate a significant experience, achievement, risk you have taken, or ethical dilemma you have faced and its impact on you.

(학생이 경험한 일이나 성취한 것, 위험을 무릅쓰고 한 일이나 도덕적인 문제점에 부닥친 일에 대해 쓰고, 그 일이 학생에게 어떤 영향을 주었는지에 대해 서술하시오.)

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